I’ve been working on my personal development and healing for the past few years, and one of the things that I struggle with the most is changing my bad habits.
If you know me personally, you’ll know that I’d always been a huge procrastinator. I’m not really the most responsible person you’ll meet. To tell you honestly, I don’t think anybody who knew me ever thought that I will become the person who I am today. I was a total bummer back then.
But now, so many things has changed. I’m running 2 businesses, I have no boss to push me, so I gotta make disciplined decisions with only willpower. I eat healthy and I exercise now because I love it (I’m on my 11th month now without soda). I’m now firm about doing something whenever I make a decision to do it. I’m now a woman of my word.
Although so much has changed, I still have a long way to go with being perfectly disciplined. I’m not perfect, but I’d already come so far if you look at where I came from. And I love it!
So what happened? How did I change my ways?
Well, after so many years of pushing myself to change and then disappointing myself after for failing, some point in the journey, I found a way to be comfortable with discomfort.
Since you’re reading this article, I’m assuming that you’re struggling in this area too. Maybe you find it hard to change your ways and you need help with being comfortable with discomfort too. Here’s some of my tips for you:
Start with your mindset.
To be really honest with you, mindset work is the 80% of the work that I did that helped me overcome this. The other 20% are all strategies and action that of course, you still need to do.
You see, being undisciplined is not at all your fault. Most of us beat ourselves out thinking we are the one to blame for being irresponsible and not good enough, but give yourself a break. It’s not you. It’s how you are wired and programmed for years. And you cannot break your years of programming with just suddenly changing your ways one day you decided to. It doesn’t work that way. It’ll be a struggle.
So deal with your mindset, slowly create a new version of yourself, change your programming, and heal what you need to heal. When you do the mindset work, changing your ways will be a breeze.
Take back your power from your ego.
You see, wanting that unhealthy food, stalking that person, wasting so much time on social media – it’s all the work of your ego. Your human urges and emotions are getting in your way.
You have to realize that being undisciplined is just you giving your power away to your ego – and you always have the choice to take your power back.
You gotta realize that you can show up as your higher self if you want to. It is your higher self who knows better. So own that power.
Again, changing your ways isn’t gonna be an overnight thing. You have to be patient with yourself when you do this, so being extra kinder to yourself is very helpful.
Instead of hating yourself when you’re not able to finish that 30 minute workout goal you set that day, why not appreciate yourself for just showing up with your workout clothes and trying for 1 minute? You will be more energized if you’re more appreciative of your efforts than when you self-blame. Be your own cheerleader. You can do this!
Be patient and make the changes in increments.
Change doesn’t happen overnight. Going cold turkey is not good for maintaining your habit for long-term. Doing it in increments is the best to do it. This way, you won’t be self-sabotaging because you’re energy got shocked with something that you’re not used to.
One of the things I learned is that whenever I want to create a new habit, I first need to cultivate the habit of showing up. Because if you cultivated the habit of showing up, the deed itself will come easier.
So for the first month of me trying to meditate, my only goal is to show up at a certain time and place and just meditate however long I can. It’s easy! It’s so much more doable rather than trying to complete a 15 min meditation everyday.
And then when I feel comfortable showing, and I feel like it’s natural to me now, I would meditate for 5 mins. And then 10. And then 15. Now I can meditate however long I want, even for hours if I want to.
Sometimes, we love setting unrealistic goals on the first week of trying, not knowing we are not ready for the discomfort that we’ll experience. because of this, we give up immediately because it’s too freaking hard to commit. So try to overcome the discomfort a little at a time. You might be impatient doing this, but trust me, this is the shortcut.
If you do all these things, there is no doubt that you can achieve any goals! I hope you get the success that you’re aiming for. Good luck!